Friday, June 22, 2007


I have been trying to sort out some of our photos and travel keepsakes, I have no idea why this bothers me so much; but it does. Actually, I am in more of a pre-sort phase at the moment. I have gathered all the loose photos in the house and have put them in assortment of totes and boxes, oh how I love my totes! Some are in old fashioned sticky page albums, some are in those one dollar flip albums, many are in the sleeves from developing and others are loose much like the memories they hold.

My goal was to just get them all in one spot and then start the fun process of sorting them. While this has been stressful it has uncovered some long forgotten memories and moments.

When Hubby and I used to travel we would set up an itinerary for both us and to give to our parents so they could keep track of our travels (did they even want this?) and we would use this while planning out our vacation.

Below is what Hubby made for our honeymoon. We really are that geeky. I am not even sure who is worse because I made the plan for our trip to the East Coast in Word Perfect on the blue screen and all. I will spare you that particular pain.

This September is our 10th anniversary and we always said we would go back to Hawaii on our 10th. Then we went to Disney World last summer so our funds are not exactly overflowing at the moment. We will go back, that I know and maybe even bring the girls. It is such a magical place and I want to share that with them. I know many people feel it is very commercial and it can be, but there is something so special and magical about Hawaii especially in the lesser known parts. You can feel the history there.

I went as a child with my father and step-mother and remember that trip so fondly, I was enchanted with the islands. While planning our honeymoon I felt compelled to return, I felt like my father was calling me there. He passed away six weeks after we got engaged at the age of 48, I will have that day burned into my mind and soul forever. Every moment, from the phone call, car drive and the hospital room is so exact in my mind I wish there was a way to erase it.

We went ahead with planning the wedding and we were married one year and one month after he passed away. It was the hardest year of my life.

Hubby's idea of a honeymoon was a long-weekend get-a-away, mine was a tad grander and was being fueled by completely irrational thoughts it seemed. I just had to go to Hawaii, there was no dissuading me and when I look back poor Hubby was so concerned for me, I can see that now. My fervor for wanting to go back to this place I visited with my father was relentless.

After much discussion (begging and pleading) he agreed to this very expensive (the money would be better spent on the mortgage) honeymoon. He loved every minute of it. The helicopter ride over the bubbling volcano, swimming with the dolphins, watching the sunrise above the clouds at Mt. Haleakala, the hypnotic beauty of the ocean, the sombre visit to Pearl Harbor - all of it.

I visited one of the hotels I stayed in as a child and walked around the grounds delighted that not much had changed. I walked on the beach my Dad and I snorkeled on and I remembered the wonder and beauty he shared with me under the ocean. I felt at peace in Hawaii for the first time since he had passed away.

My Dad was an anal, type-A person too, so I come by it naturally. As August approaches and the anniversary of his death comes near I think of him often. My brother is getting married in July and I am sad he will miss this, another child of his is getting married. Life is not fair sometimes, but oh how it moves on.

He would have been proud of my itinerary, he really would.


Oh, The Joys said...

I am so type A it is scary. Like a freaky horror film.

Omaha Mama said...

Beautiful memories. All of them. I can't imagine losing my dad, it makes me tear up for you.

The itinerary. Oh, how I love an itinerary. Your hubs looks like a great planner, what a catch!

I am trying right now, to decide how I want to preserve our family vacations. With separate bound photo books made online with the digital photos? With one big scrapbook? What do I do with the extra maps, flyers, etc? It's a big decision and I'll surely overdo it, but it's something that gives me great pleasure.

Thanks for sharing this. I love that you are fellow geeks! :-)

Hubs and I are heading to Cheyenne for a few days for a wedding in 2 weeks. I suggested that for the first night, we should just fly by the seat of our pants, and stay wherever we land. I couldn't handle it. We've got reservations at a hotel on the way. I just couldn't help myself.


Alpha DogMa said...

I love Hawaii, too. I wanted to get married there, but Omega Man's mom was undergoing chemo at the time and couldn't be in public for long periods of time (this precluded an 8 hour flight), but I'm going to drag the Omega Man there one day! It is just so magical.

Yeah for Mr. Jen for giving into the honeymoon plans!We did the long weekend get-away and it was anti-climatic.

Beck said...

I am mildly type A, but I am also completely happy going with whatever I want to do, so long as I know where I'm going to sleep that night.

Mimi said...

What a sweet post, Jen. I can only imagine what that year must have been like for you -- when we're in pain, we grab at whatever rope we can hold on to, the rope that keeps us tethered to some kind of normal ...

Christine said...

oh jen, my father had passed before my wedding, too, and i ache thinking of that. Of him never meting my kids or the baby my sister will have in the winter. I am so glad you went to Hawaii for your honeymoon. How wonderful it must have been!

And it will be my ten year anniversary in September, too!

NotSoSage said...

Jen, I do hope that you get a chance to return in September and commune with your father's spirit that way again.

This was so wonderful.