Monday, June 25, 2007

Monday Musings - Playing House

When we first got married I felt like we were playing house. I kept waiting for someone to out us and take away our pretend life. When I look at the photos of us in the sales trailer proudly standing beside our model of house I think what babies we were, I can't believe they sold us a house!

We have many photos documenting buying our home and the progress of it being built. I don't think any of those photos quite capture the essence of playing house quite the way these photos do. Nor do any of us in the house the first few years.

When pregnant with Papoosie Girl I bought this adorable mint green snowsuit with paw mitts and a kitty face from The Bay. It was the first baby item I bought and I just had to have it. As soon as I got it home I put in on a stuffed dog and tried it out. Why there are no sheets on the bed is a mystery, I was cleaning them perhaps? This was the guest room that would become the nursery painted a most beautiful, soft robins egg blue with accents of sage green and cream. I was inspired by the bedding we bought and built the colour scheme around it. It is now Rosebud's room and Papoosie Girl has moved into the bedroom next door which is a shocking Pepto Bismal pink. I still love my nursery and seeing it in its former life is strange.

Papoosie Girl came home from the hospital in that same snowsuit and wore it for several months. Now we were playing house with a little doll. In the photo she is packed up and ready to leave the hospital. When I look at myself holding up that stuffed animal in the snowsuit I feel a mix of emotions. The knowledge that I have now of how my life would change forever staggers me. The me of before would never have been able to understand that. Everyone tells you life changes, you change, but those are words to be understood in the moment and moments that follow the car ride home. I remember thinking as we walked out of the hospital New Year's Eve 2000 why are they letting us leave? I kept waiting, right up until she was buckled into the car, for someone to tap us on the shoulder and stop us. Stop imposters! They put that snowsuit on a stuffed animal!

Of course we did bring her home and there she stayed, a brand new member for us to play house with and indeed we do.


Beck said...

Oh, I KNOW that feeling. My husband and I spent all of our first pre-natal classes making ourselves laugh, because it was all such a Jolly Lark. I can't believe they let us take our baby home from the hospital - we were such goobers.

Alpha DogMa said...

A few months ago, we were debating a move and I was struck that for myself and the OmegaMan it would be just ANOTHER house in just ANOTHER town, but for the kids it would be a huge upheaval. The stakes seem so much huger when I think how they will impact them on a daily basis.

And so we are not moving because I was struck by The Fear. The Fear of F*cking Up My Kids Forever.

I remember Will Smith on Leno (or Letterman or Sajack) talking about buying a new TV with picture-in-picture capablities, and he got a 75 minute tutorial from the salesguy and a 500 page booklet to take home. And when he had his first son: NOTHING. Nada. No training. No manual. No 1-800 number to call in the middle of the night when the programming was all screwy.

Also - I'm assuming - no extended warranty.

Christine said...

Oh this post made me stop mid-read and look at all my old baby picture of my girl, now six. I remember standing in the shower the day after coming home with her and feeling my c-section incision and thinking that maybe it was an alien that came out of me. I loved that baby fiercely, but she was an ALIEN! Her real Martian parents never came back to get her. But that's ok, she's a keeper!

Omaha Mama said...

That is awesome. "Playing house." To be honest, I still usually feel like I'm playing house. Even though I've got two kids, a dog, a hubs, a mortgage - gah!

Great post - I look forward to Mondays for your posts!!!

NotSoSage said...

That photo of the stuffed dog is classic.

I think so few of us actually know what we're in for, but I didn't have that feeling that I hear so many mothers describe. I just wanted to be alone in the house with Joe and the baby...but maybe it took me a few more days to realise just what I'd gotten myself into. :)